Things To Do When You're Bored
 

Bored - Actually a website

Random Stuff To Do
I didn't write these, but thought they were hilarious.

  1. Throw a surprise party for yourself. Turn off all the lights, then turn them on and yell "Surprise!" Act shocked.
  2. Color outside the lines.
  3. Go to grocery store in a bathrobe, slippers, and a towel around your head. Rubber ducky optional.
  4. Invent strange and unusual diseases with symptoms such as boils and welts, strange hacking sounds, change of skin tone (bright pastels work best), delusions, non-functioning limbs, etc). Then pretend you have them. Make sure they're highly contagious, then cough and lean on people.
  5. Dress in a black cape and mask and pretend to be the Phantom of the Opera. Also good for most other musicals and superheroes as well (knowledge of theme songs a great asset).
  6. Turret's syndrome.
  7. Go up to a mall and conduct a survey using such questions as "What is your favorite smurf?", and "How many licks does is take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop?", and "Which do you prefer: Original or Extra Crispy?"
  8. Read backwards.
  9. Speak a foreign language while shopping. Ask lots of questions and act frustrated when they can't understand you.
  10. Glue money to the floor and watch people try to pick it up.
  11. Go up to a salesman and ask "May I help you?"
  12. Go into a building and set all the clocks ahead one hour (or behind, if you're really bold).
  13. Go to a park bench and walk around it in a circle. If someone asks what you're doing, tell them that you are making the earth turn (Someone has to keep it going).
  14. Go door to door selling individual M&M's (or Post-It-Note pads, paper, grass samples, toothpaste, cereal-by-the-flake or gram, or anything else you think might be amusing).
  15. Pretend to have a split personality. Maybe even three. Talk to yourself.
  16. While riding a bus, every time the bus driver applies the brake, yell, "We're going to crash! We're all going to die!" and duck in the fetal position under your seat.
  17. Jam miniature marshmallows up your nose and sneeze them out. See how many you can do at once.
  18. When someone says "Have a nice day," tell them you have other plans.
  19. Make a list of things to do that you've already done.
  20. Fill out your tax forms using Roman Numerals.
  21. Leaf through a "National Geographic" and draw underwear on the natives.
  22. Pay your electric bill in pennies.
  23. Drive to work in reverse.
  24. Polish your car with ear wax.
  25. Braid the hairs in each nostril.
  26. Write a short story using alphabet soup.
  27. Stare at people through the tines of a fork and pretend they're in jail.
  28. Go up to people, ask their name, and give them a nametag.
  29. Communicate in mime.
  30. Count how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll pop.
  31. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
  32. Type using only appendages other than your hands (nose, feet, elbow, ears, etc).
  33. Do your math homework with an abacus.
  34. Learn all the world capitals
  35. Write a novel
  36. See how hot various items can get in the microwave (ie. olives, grapes, etc.)
  37. Make lists. Movies you've seen, unusual names, people you've met in your lifetime, kinds of writing utensils, etc
  38. Alphabetize your books, cds, movies, etc
  39. Color-coordinate your wardrobe
  40. Compose songs using a touch tone phone
  41. Disassemble items and try to put them back together (i.e. pens, TV, radio, calculator, cars, etc.)
  42. Build a card house
  43. Stick plungers on the wall
  44. Find out how close you can get your elbow to your mouth
  45. Measure things
  46. Order junk-mail
  47. Phone your house from your house
  48. Hold your breath for as long as possible
  49. Change all of your money to pennies
  50. See what interesting things you can find in your nose
  51. Sing the alphabet backwards
  52. Make a big ball of rubber bands, tin foil, gum, etc.
  53. Decorate your bedroom with the foil off of gum wrappers
  54. Play ping-pong with yourself
  55. Make imaginary friends
  56. Grow a Chia-pet
  57. Flip a coin --> best 51 of 101
  58. Cook or bake something by Jell-O
  59. See how much Tabasco sauce or hot peppers you can eat without drinking water
  60. Put your name on everything
  61. Label everything
  62. In alphabetical order, list all the words you know
  63. Call every number in the phone book and see how many friends you can make
  64. Talk to telemarketers
  65. Read the dictionary
  66. Count your toes (hey, you never know)
  67. Drink 12 shots of Vodka. Count your toes without falling over. Compare results to recent counting.
  68. Build a spaceship out of household appliances. Fly.
  69. Start a business. Sell grass, toothpicks, lamps, etc.

Stuff To Do At Wal-Mart
Some more funny stuff to do, didn't write this once again.

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvin ball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially in thin narrow aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in House wares," and see what happens.
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this crap, anyway?"
15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."
17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"
20. Put M&M's on layaway.
21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Pompoms.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Bat cave!"
26. TP as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.
29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
31. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
33. Take bets on the battle described above.
34. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
35.While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: "Marco Polo."
43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.
45. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.
46. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"
49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
*BONUS* Attempt all of the above during the same visit.